The People In Your Circle

In any group of connections be it business, friendships, or otherwise, there are 3 kinds of people: visionaries, fence-sitters, and resistors. Which one are you? What dynamics do you have in your friend group? What dynamics do you have in your salon, or with your clients? 

Who are you in this scenario? Are there people in your circle that shouldn't be there anymore? We are carefully curating our circle these days. Check your own mindset and know who belongs there.

Transcript

Patrice B: 0:40

Welcome back y'all to that most randomest podcast ever. I am back y'all. Let me tell you something. I don't know if y'all noticed but this shit's therapeutic for me. I love some of y'all. I hope y'all appreciate it because some of the things I share with y'all, I share in the salon. I'm sharing it with friends. So I be feeling like I'm gonna share it with the world. So if you know somebody who be needing some of these words, you might be in this situation sharing. Share it with your friend. Let's talk about it. Let's chat about it. But I'm going to tell you something in this season, I learned about your goddamn self. You've learned about others as well. Am I new? It's not new. I shouldn't even make that shit up. It ain't new. Right. But when it comes to me and who I choose to have in my space right now, you gotta look at your dynamic, right? And that dynamic of your friendship. And that dynamic is forever evolving, but sometimes we want to keep it the same out of comfort, right? And so like everything, when it comes to connections, people, yes, it is still business related to me. And that's how I process it because you learn things on either side of the water. Even in relationships, you can apply something to business. But in this situation, when I, was going around into different salons and I'm teaching classes. One of the things that we in education to learn how to educate is being aware of your audience, being aware of who is going to be in this class or the types of people in this class, right? So they labeled them as three different things. And this also applies to your damn friendships and people in your life, right? So be aware of this. You got three different types. You got those visionaries, you got a fence setter, and you got a resistor. Now, first of all, you probably need to indicate who the hell you are and these connections. What type of person are you? Are you a visionary who sees all the possibilities, right? More positive spirit, go getter. Um, willing to learn something new, take accountability for the actions, right? Then you have your fence sitter and the fence sitter, like in a classroom, they'll be the person that goes either way. They're not positive. They'll go with whoever's swaying them at the moment, right? And not too much of a voice stays quiet, chill. And then you have your resistor. And in the classroom, the resistor is almost like that squeaky wheel that needs attention. But they tend to resist things. They think that they know it all. They know it all before you even got there. They want to be combative sometimes in the classroom, or they, they have to be like, everything is a battle and the attention needs to be on them. And a lot of times that person tends to have a very strong personality that can take your class far left. Okay. usually they also in your workplace that'll bring down the environment. Always negative. Always got something going on. Mouth is always open and probably hardly ever. Right. but the interesting thing is, is that that happens in your friendship circles as well. You have those friends that are doing a thing and they're super positive. They're making things happen. You had that friend and just like, Hey, I'm gonna go with whatever the crowd does. No real opinions. Um, yeah. Tends to be pretty quiet, chill, good with whatever. And then you had that one friend that's always in the shit. That can turn your night left. Um, piss poor energy and sometimes just don't try to cover it up like they're not the one. They like a mean girl. They tend to be like the mean girl. And they want to get people on their team. To make it seem like everything is bad. But you gotta think about your circle. Right? And who are your people? But who are you within this circle? So I was having this conversation with a friend of mine about one of the people in her circle. And I'm saying in her circle because she was claiming it to be in her circle. Um, claiming this girl to be in her circle, but they had a difference of opinions. And lately these days, everybody got a damn difference of opinion. They swaying different ways. Who knows? Some people are surprised you as some of the choices that they choose, but I digress. But in this conversation, she was like, but tree, she's in my circle. And my friend completely was disagreeing with this person in her circle. Like they did not have the same opinions and I had to say to her, I was like, well, why is she in your circle? And my friend had to take a whole pause. Cause when I say she was fired the hell up with this conversation and back and forth and not being on the same page. My friend was like, wait a minute, hold up. Now, while she is family friend, you guys definitely have a difference of opinion and she should no longer be your circle. She might be the circumference. She on the perimeter. She went outside and sometimes we got to consider that. Who do you let in? And I saw a lot of people out here. That's why I keep my circle small, but we had this conversation before and another. Podcasts like, no, you better choose wisely because it's not necessarily keeping it small, but it's keeping the right people. But who are they? And honestly, you need a little balance in your life. Sometimes you might need a little bit resistant to bring your butt out the clouds to be like, I don't know about that, but understand who the hell is in your circle, but these days, what are we afraid of? I don't care how long I've known you, if you are not elevated to the space of where I am, you must go. You become this circumference. You can't be the inner circle. You can't. And it's no hard feelings. You just on the outside. You're not quite on the inside because I see you for who you are. But I had this conversation with a client as well, because she had a friend who was mean girling, right? And I'm talking about straight mean girl and, and in denial acting like, Oh, I am do that. I don't know what you talking about. Cause they play with you and they creating a whole problem. And then want to talk about a problem. They have, they supposedly didn't have, but gave straight mean girl. And this girl was, this woman was a friend of hers for, um, Years. And we're not talking about five, three, probably damn near 20. But that circle changes and sometimes we got to reevaluate that shit. Cause I'm going to tell you, keeping certain people in your circle will bring you the hell down. But I do believe at first, you need to take accountability for who you are in that circle and what you need at that moment. Who's in your circle and who are you? Now I can tell you, I might be a Most of the time I'm probably the visionary in the group because I want to see the positive and shit I'm trying to grow. I'm always trying to take over the world I'm like pinkie in the brain after this motherfucker because every day I'm thinking about something new a new way to get it I'm gonna be positive about it. I'm gonna keep going girl. You got this what you better not let them people play with you I got your back round to the side But I am also that friend that I ain't hard though. We go out You What do you want to eat? I can eat anywhere. And if I don't want to eat, I'm cool with a little sip. I ain't gonna die. But there are some people that if we don't do that, then, you know, life is over. And I'm like, girl, it ain't that serious. Sir, get it together. But it's not always as serious as we make it. But in our season of like, you want to grow, you're emotionally elevating, you are elevating in business, Work, check your circle and you might need to have several circles of friends, but there are definitely some people that need to be in the circumference. They in the area, but they ain't even coming all the way in. They don't get a slice of the pie and we got to realize that and I know that's just all I'm going to tell you. I know it's all. And I, I honestly believe I got some good people with me. They keep me grounded sometimes and they remind me of, Hey girl, you know, that's you. And they accountable. And I love that for me. I love that I've had friendships for years. And I understand them, they understand me, and we great. They allow me to be pinky in the brain often and I harass the shit out of them. Anybody who was listening, I love all y'all. I harass you with all this positivity. Sometimes I can be overwhelming with this positivity cause I wake up off the shits and I will ring their phone. Girl, guess what I thought about you? For your business. Or you should do this. You said this yesterday and you know what? I think that you could do better and we can work it out. I'm that friend. But I do have those resistors. I have those fence sitters and you have to learn how to deal with them in your circle, in your class, in your life of learning. How do you move about? How do you treat people recognizing where they are? Do they deserve to be there? How much attention do you give them? How do you give them attention? Do you allow them to have their voice when they seem to have none? And it's being aware of the people around you, but who you are to the people that's in your circle is just as fucking important. I keep my circle small. Cause you can't trust people. But you know, a question always asks, do you trust your damn self? Where is your mindset? And I ain't going to sit here and say, I trust everybody. Cause I will definitely give you a rope to hang your ass. Scorpio energy. Hang yourself. You said it. I didn't. But what I am is if I'm your friend, I'm your goddamn friend. I'm in there. I'm that friend to take the tags off hit somebody with the bumper. What we got to do. But in this season of just emotionally evolving, evolving in business, it's like the circles are shifting. The circles are changing how much time, energy and space you give to someone is important for your growth and how you are. So today I hope and pray that you got the right circle. And I hope that you know who you are in that circle. I know my Vagas, they get on your damn nerves. Y'all better leave them to the circumference because they can't get a piece of the pie. And as always, with my randomness, I appreciate you and until next time.