Walking Tall In Your Healing

This is a season of growth, challenges, and leveling up. Do you feel it too? I've been working on being self-aware on my journey of healing and we've had some good conversations in the salon about life and growth.


You know how you feel like you've done some healing, then the universe sends you a new challenge? Stay steady and sturdy in yourself and the people who are uncomfortable with that will show themselves out!

Transcript

Patrice B: 0:42

Welcome back, y'all. I'm so happy to be back with you guys. Yes, the disclaimer is that the man is back on the show. Allergy season has kicked up and I really think I'm invincible and I'm not. I don't have no leg in this fight with these allergies. And it's times where before, y'all, I would just be like, I'm not taping because the man was strong. Like. Y'all would be like, is this Patrice or is this a special guest? But today, y'all, it's, it's, it's me. I'm giving y'all the raw and the real. Now today, I just want to shoot this shit with y'all because I realize that in this season of growth and like leveling up, you're going to be challenged like shit. Like I've been, Like what in the world is going on now? All of y'all that believe in the moons, the stars, the alignments, the planets, the retrogrades and your future. Like it came through like a storm last week and I was like, what in the world is universal? I tell me, but what I have been noticing and this healed and healing and journey. Cause y'all know, I ain't always. I ain't always healed, right? But I'm still in the journey of healing. I've healed some things, but I'm working on things, you know, as they come. And I think we've all got to be at some point self aware. And at this stage I have been truly, truly, truly self aware of me and my shit. I tell y'all that all the time. I take ownership of mine. Now today's, conversation definitely need to come with a little drink being made on the spot. Because at this point, child, we all know that retrograde came with a little something. So today we just going into like, what does that healed and healing look like? You know, sometimes we think that we overcome one thing, but And now we done and that it's over and now we, we all good, right? We done. We over with it. It's all great. But let me tell you something. It ain't, I can't even tell you that it is never ending. Now I find that the more that I begin to level up, In my energy and anybody who knows me, I just had this conversation this week. Like, I think that I'm taller than I am. I do. Right. This is, this is a point in the story. Just, this is some of my, my, my healing and heal, right? So this week with some of the things that are just like in my, my journey of being healed and healing. I, I think I mentioned to you guys before about how I asked my son how he views himself, right? And so in this week's conversation with one of my clients, because we had some really good conversations in the salon, Just about life and growth. Cause I'm sharing this journey with them as well, right? They're sharing with me. We are getting it together. Okay. Now I need y'all to know that I'm about five, three and a half, five, four. And I think five, four is pushing it, but you won't let this girl right here be great because you can't tell me that I ain't tall. I believe that I am really like a five, six, five, seven, And play with me on a really good day when this energy is giving big. I'm 5'9 in my mind, because you can't tell me otherwise. Like when I'm out here in these streets, I'm walking into the room like I'm really on that 5'9 I ain't 5'3 I'm 5'9 And the walk matches the energy and I believe this. And police said, I'mma let y'all know that's a little delulu, but it ain't coming from the cup that we just poured. But, honest statements. Like I do believe that I am tall. I believe that my energy is big. I believe that the love that I give is big. I can't nobody tell me otherwise. So in this season of being healed and healing, I am becoming and noticing how I've really, honestly, truly view myself. Now, I believe that I am tall, but what I see for myself is that my energy is big. Everything that I have inside of me is big. It is amazing. The love that I give is so big. You know, I'm full Scorpio, you get all in or you get nothing, but when I'm all in, it's big. I give big energy in everything that I do. When I'm in the salon, I know that the experiences that I create for my customers is an experience that they may not get anywhere else. The level of education that I give to them and empower them to know so they're not out here doing no craziness. It's big. It's huge. I go above and beyond. When I walk into my spaces that are for me, especially home, I'm not coming in five three, boo. I'm coming in five, nine. I'm coming in big. And I had a situation where last week, and you know how when you healed and healing, the universe said, Oh, you needed to learn a new lesson. You going to walk into something. Some things that I didn't really want to see, but I walked in on it. But the way that I entered the room, I didn't come in small. I came in stallion like. I walk like a stallion. I am that. But in a situation where it could just break down your spirit and make you small, make you feel small, it didn't do that. I was like, Whoa. And it was, it was a, it was a very like off putting surprise, but the surprise was, it was a good slash bad surprise, it didn't take away from who I am and how I view myself. And sometimes we allow people to Take away your energy, your bigness, all of the things that make you, you and make you great and make you grand. And we can't do that. And that day was like, I had different, you know, things coming through that they were trying to penetrate this energy. They was trying to, they was trying to really, really penetrate This healed and healing journey in a way that they think they were going to stop it or change the outcome. And some people don't even, I'm going to tell you this, some people maybe unintentionally don't realize that that's what they're trying to do. It's change you. And I was talking to my oldest son because we have conversations and I talked to both of my sons on the level of I need them to understand, know themselves, love themselves. But we talk candidly about how we view each other and where we are in life. Like my oldest son is very in tuned. When I'm a little off, he know like mom about to pop or she's tired today. Brain is overwhelmed. He knows these things. And I know y'all with my ADHD, it seems like I'm all over the place, but it goes back to the conversation of not being moved when you own your shit. My oldest son has this view of me and he said that I was, and I'm gonna tell you, it's real special. It's sometimes how he, explains things, but he used the words, he's like, you know, when you're like indirectly manipulated. And I was like, what kind of crap is this boy about to tell me today? So his description of me is that my son feels as if I'm a boulder. It's big. I got big energy. And when I encounter people, they initially are drawn to me. And then it's uncomfortable. She take up a lot of space. So I want to move it. I need to relocate it. This boulder, I want to break it down. And what happens is, is that for the boulder to move, The person who has the problem attempts to move it and when they can't move it one way they shift, they change, they go to the other side, they attempt to move it and sometimes will bring in items to help move that boulder. But I stay firm and I stay planted in who I am and it makes others uncomfortable. And I was like, God damn, boy, that was kind of, That was like you, your mama chow. And I appreciated him for that. Right. Because the description was kind of that space that I had been in last week where it was coming from all angles. But you know, at first I was like, Oh, I'm a little tired. But then it was like, Oh, fuck that. We good. We are good. Especially once you go back and you check you and where you are in your space, you can not be moved. I am big, I have big energy and as long as you know, people, I am definitely clear of when I, I told y'all, I take ownership of passionate, petty, positive and penitentiary, all them P's and Patrice is. It's me, I know that for certain, I know when they come, I know how they are, I know, I am aware of what has caused, you know, petty to pop out because petty is reactive, petty, my petty isn't like, Oh, I'm just petty out here in this world because I ain't got that much time. I don't have that much energy. I'm really on my positive and passionate because I want everybody to be great because I want to be great. And thanks to the Tito's today, bringing this conversation to life. So the things that I realized is that the more I take ownership of me, I cannot be moved from where I am. I had someone that I had not talked to. I had decided that that connection was no longer for me. And I was very clear like, you know, I'm good on that. Like, I think we could really be friendly, just friendly, you know, cause I do believe friends and friendly are two different types of friends. We can be social, but we may not be good, good, close buddy, buddy. And I thought that that was okay. And they asked for a favor. And. I was like, I was super busy and anybody who knows me, you know what I'm saying? I'd be all over the place. I ain't always focused. So I might respond in my head and don't send that text message. But I forgot to respond. And the next day they responded with, nevermind. It wasn't even. And so what they were asking for was not an immediate today, not even the day that they responded, but It was their entryway to try to move the boulder to maybe she'll change her mind because what happened right after, like, nevermind, I'll get someone else to do it. I said, Oh my goodness, my bad. I had a question and I answered it. I asked in my head, but I never pressed in. What time were you looking for for that? And I thought that it was an immediate response to that. Like, Oh, like, I'm still willing to do it. And. The next two text messages look like biographies of somebody's life about how they felt. And it came with, it was like feelings, a lot of feelings of I could be evil. I think that I am a princess and even called me Cruella Deville. I was like, what the hell? So I guess you didn't need help because this doesn't even pertain to what you asked when you initially sent the text. So I mean that baby had some things on their mind that they needed to get off. Now If in your mind, you feel like that's how you feel about me, then take ownership. I probably would be. Cruella DeVille, evil, and everything, because you probably caused that. Because my patty is reactive. But the thing was, is that this time it just came in silence, because it did. The, the energy that I initially said no to was nothing more than that. It was nothing else that I need to respond to or give energy to. So if it wasn't positive, I'm not responding. Now there's people out here that's given like block lists. They got to block people to get out of their energy. And I believe that long as I stay planted and this boulder energy, your ass going to exit. Because you're uncomfortable in this space, this space of positivity, this space of being passionate and growth and healing and heal. When they're uncomfortable, shit, they exit themselves. I don't even have to do it. My silence is enough. And I'm going to tell you, I don't even have a list to be blocked. I don't. I'd be like, your ass just got to be uncomfortable because that's your problem. Not mine. Because if I don't like you, I don't like you. I'm a gone by my life. It doesn't stop. I ain't giving you much time. I ain't searching for nothing cause I don't care. I don't like you. And that could be also my Scorpio energy. Check a moon, check or something. But it is what it is. But I do believe that I stand tall in everything that I do because I do have that integrity at this stage I own and know my worth. And so if this big energy makes you more uncomfortable, then go ahead and exit sir, ma'am, them, they and other, it's okay. Because none of this energy is intending to hurt you. I hope that this big energy empowers you because I believe that if I am in someone's space and I share this energy, I want you to be great as well. And if it's not your time to be great, it's not your time to be great. Be uncomfortable and exit and revisit when it is your time. I believe that about relationships, friendships, I ain't gotta block you. I ain't even that focused to block nobody, let's be honest. Real random side note, y'all ever get that little, that good mixer that you want with your drinks? I'mma tell you, that dull orange peach mango, it go great in breakfast. It's great with a little mimosa and it's great with a little touch of, a little alcohol. Just so you know, if you haven't gotten it, you probably should. It's But I really want you guys to be able to stand, be bold and be big in your energy, in your journey, even when it comes with some flaws. Cause I even had to apologize to a friend for my spicing this last week. I was in my big energy. Sometimes that big, big energy comes with some things you need to realize, but I had snapped in a way and I had to come back to say, you know what? That energy was not directed towards you. It was my emotions. And her friendship was much more important, more important to me than my ego at that time. And I needed to say, the way that I spoke to you was not appropriate. You did not deserve that. I didn't sleep well knowing that I had spoke to someone who was kind and considerate to me. And I came from a place of emotion because I was having a day and it wasn't the right side of me that propels me forward. And I took ownership of my shit and apologized. I'm glad it is a friend who understands who she, she dealing with and she didn't hold it against me, but I got my words off my chest. But how often do people do that and take ownership of, you know what? I was wrong as hell for that day, that moment I was wrong. Now whether somebody accepts your apology or not, that's something different. That might be something within them or it could be damage is done and you have to take your L. But I'm going to tell you what people don't get to do is try to. Move that boulder because they're uncomfortable with how you shine. They try to break you down because they feel like you should be less than for it to be comfortable for them. And I'll be damned if I'm going to play small for anybody. Note that I am five, nine in my mind. I told y'all that Call it the Lulu, call it what you want, but I'm big, I'm giving me stallion tall. And I know it's only in my mind. That's the reality of it. Cause I'm really not that tall, but you can't tell me that I'm not. But my message this week is be big, be you, be that bolder. Don't let nobody break you down cause they uncomfortable. Be indirectly manipulative and move that space in that room and make them others uncomfortable. With all of your energy, that big energy that you have in your healed and healing journey, make them uncomfortable. It's okay. No need to block them cause they will exit. And it's a sight to see when people walk away, they should be gone. I hope to help somebody this week. Was that retrograde head through me? They spun me for a loop last week. I was like, is this going to be an episode of snapped? But I had to bring myself back to the reality. And let me tell you something. I love my son and my sons cause we had some really good conversations because in my healed and healing journey, I'm definitely sharing all of this with my mans, my, my young men. I'm going to know their value. They're going to know their worth. They are going to be confident and make some of the best decisions for them to know themselves and love themselves. Because I want that for them. I want that for my friends. I want that for my family. So those that are in my circle, they big too. Cause we got big energy. I believe in them. Cause I'm that friend. And if people don't pour into you, don't allow it them to stop your growth. Just stand firm in your shit. Even if you got to have a little touch of diluted to get there. Cheers to a new week. And I know you guys got options to be anywhere, but you chose to be with me and I'm grateful for that. Yet again, this week. On. The most randomest podcast ever. And yeah, no tequila this week, a little vodka. And don't forget that dull mango, orange peach mango. It's nice. It's a nice little addition to your mimosas, your pancakes and your alcohol, but enjoy your week. Thank you as always.